Identify signs of Jealousy In you and Around you

You must have heard the word “JEALOUSY” as commonly as the word LOVE in your life. But have you ever tried to dig it a bit deeper and understand this word, its feelings and behavior associated with it? Most answers will be NO! It is such a common word and feeling that every person is living with and don’t even bother to give it a thought if it's ruining your peace of mind and content of life.

What jealousy is?

Jealousy generally refers to the thoughts or feelings of insecurity, fear, and concern over a relative lack of possessions or safety. It strikes people of all ages, genders, and is most typically aroused when a person perceives a threat to a valued relationship from a third party. The threat may be real or imagined.

Many people take it lightly by thinking it to be a sign of love. But in real it is not! It is in fact a sign of insecurity. Jealousy and insecurity move side by side. It is a negative emotion that stems from both desire and insecurity, but not love.

Read more about Jealousy:

 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jealousy

Jealousy can consist of one or more emotions such as anger, resentment, inadequacy, helplessness or disgust. I have heard every second person saying around me “People are jealous of me”. You must be in the same boat, I am sure. And that is no way wrong at all. It is most of the times true that actually people are jealous of you.

But most of the times this is VICE VERSA. People are jealous of you BUT you are also jealous of them, if not all but at least someone. Don’t worry, it’s all psychologically natural and very common until it is in limits.

There are different types of jealousies. Most common of them are:

1. Romantic jealousy

2. Siblings jealousy

3. Professional jealousy

4. Friend jealousy

5. Parent child jealousy 

Jealousy is healthy until it doesn’t turn into envy or become reactive. E.g. Professional jealousy is healthy if you use it for a healthy competition and progress. Small amount of jealousy can be handled but a lot of it can cause destruction and becomes toxic.

“It’s such a poisonous emotion because, at the end of the day, you’re no better off, you’re unhappier, and the person you are jealous of is still successful or good-looking or whatever they are.”  Naval Ravikant

Now tell me honestly did any person came into your mind after reading my topic? If yes, then that very person is in your subconscious that is irritating you and making you feel insecure and jealous.

Here is a list of some behaviours and feelings of a jealous person:

1.   That person is always restless.

2.   His mind is full of negative thoughts.

3.   He always finds bad in his life and good in others life.

4.   He is never satisfied with anything.

5.   He often becomes reactive on small things.

6.    He is often left alone, he loses relationships like friends, partner because of his toxic nature.

Now let’s see how to identify it and see few solutions for it.

Identify Jealousy in people

1. Research has shown that people who talk a lot and are more involved in gossips have more anxiety, unhappiness and aggressive behavior. They make false arguments and spread false rumors about others to spread negativity about that person and make them feel superior and hide their insecurities. This is also a form of jealousy.

2. They will never be happy with your achievements and success and they will be the ones who will disappear from the scene while others appreciate and congratulate you if they are not in front of you.

3. And when they are in front of you, they will react over with overly appraising you and giving insincere compliments.

4. They will never give you an honest advice.

5. They will poke out negativities from your plans and intentions and try to destroy them.

6. These people often imitate you. They copy your  lifestyle, your accent etc. with some minor changes and then compare them and try to prove themselves better.

E.g. if they like your dressing they will copy you with some colour change or a bit of design change and then prove their dress to be prettier and their choice to be smarter.

7. Be aware of the duplicity (dual face) of the people. You will never be able to judge their behavior. They behave in one way in front of you and very differently away from you. Such people have hidden jealousy for you inside them.

8. It is the habit of such people to outdo you in every possible way to steal the glory and they behave very competitively.

9.  Such people will always highlight your facilities and ease in life.

10. If you will give good advice to the person who is jealous of you he will not like it and will get angry.

 

Solutions to cope with jealousies:

1.  Count your blessings not tears.

2.  Appreciate yourself.

3.   Don’t let your desires overrule what you have.

4.  Be thankful and try to stay happy with what you have.

5.  Don’t compare your life with others because comparison kills content and peace of your life and you cannot always have what others are having.

         “You can be the moon and still be jealous of the stars”                        Gary Allan

6.  In spouse relationship it should not exceed limits and should not be reactive.

8. Trust your partner and share your feelings calmly.

9.  Let negative thoughts and feelings go, don’t let them incorporate in you.

10. Don’t idealize things shared on social media. It’s just one part of other’s life that you are seeing. Everyone has good and bad in their lives.

11. Be positive and sit with optimistic people.

 These are the few points that you need to analyse within yourself and in people around you. This will help you figure out jealousy and work on it to keep it healthy and don’t let it ruin your life by increasing your insecurities and fear to the level of restlessness and unhappiness.

Like jealousy love is also a very important part of human behaviour. You can read beauty of child mother love in this article.

Small children love for their parents